By Saif A | @mrseras | Photo © Chris Jepson | www.chrisjepson.com


I love a slut. I love being with someone who has such a flame in his heart, or loins for that matter, for the pleasures of another man that he completely abandons all self-regard with an aim to satisfy this insatiable hunger for another person and it is magnificently compelling. They are terrific.

They have this mystical quality of self-abandonment when it comes to other people they like that they free themselves from their insecurities and make it wholly about the other person, and will scale their actions in response to the how people react to them. In my opinion, they’re incredibly powerful and interactive seducers,  who we all really need to learn something from. It is incredibly hard to resist someone who’s giving it his all just so he can get a piece of your attention; it’s passionate, it’s consuming and it’s very, very flattering.

To be slutty is to be sexually liberated. To be slutty means you are free and open to experiment and chase what thrills you in a sexual capacity and develop your tastes to discover more about yourself through other people.  It is a form of physical expression, and we gays have always been big on expression. In fact, we are fighting for people to see that it doesn’t matter how we express our physical desires, we are still people who are doing no harm and thus deserve equal rights. So why, then, is there this internal judgment of those who get labelled as ‘slutty’?

The politics may have had something to do with it, but there has been this recent surge in prosaic morality that dictates that we must all conduct ourselves in an ‘appropriate’ manner to be deemed acceptable to society at large. This almost scripturesque form of thought is ironic, considering the message of what we, as ‘deviants of sexuality’ want society to understand. The problem we have is that the world ‘slut’ is wrought with negative connotations. You have people who will dismiss an interest in someone because they appear to have any of the attributes of a slut.

Slut shaming, a phrase that was coined through ‘slut walks’, is something the gay society needs to stop in its entirety. Slut shaming is the practice of judging someone based on how they act or dress; it is mostly used to suggest that if a provocatively dressed woman was to be raped, it’s OK because of the way she acted or dressed. In essence, she was asking for it. Do we, as a community, condone that kind of message? I, personally, do not and I don’t think you should either. To slut shame is essentially allowing the thought that because a man takes off his shirt in a club, he is ‘game’ and up for it and the important matter of consent is ignored when it should always be something clear and established. For all you know, he could just be literally cooling off from the heat of the club, and you’ve already assumed the ‘worst’ of him.

It is very unbecoming of us to assume something of anyone and  in the last issue of FS, there was an opinion piece by @jamesy_moo on body image that bothered me because there was this message of uppity superiority to keeping your clothes on by saying that mystery is better. The message to take away here is that you are no better for keeping it on, and you are no better for taking it off — just do whatever it is you want to do, let people do whatever they want to do and let’s stop judging other people for the choices they want to make.  


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